Results
What usually changes as we work together
A longer‑running case: “It was like a switch flipped”
A guy in his 30s came to me after a long, rough stretch. Work stress, burnout, dating disappointments, a history of performance anxiety—and then one morning he woke up and something was just…off. No energy, no drive, no appetite for anything, including sex.
“I had completely lost my libido. Like, gone. Zero performance. Zero desire. Sex had been a way to feel alive, and suddenly it just wasn’t there anymore.”
Things got very dark. For over two years he tried everything he could find: psychotherapy, EMDR, acupuncture, breathwork, meditation, hypnotherapy elsewhere, even ketamine‑assisted work.
“Every single time—no results. Zero progress. I was starting to think this was just…my life now.”
We worked together intensively. Sessions combined deep questioning, targeted hypnosis, and specific cognitive exercises between calls. At first the shifts were subtle. Then he had a normal sexual experience again after months of nothing.
“The first time I was able to have a normal sexual experience again…the joy I felt was just indescribable.”
His sex life is back, erections are strong, sex is enjoyable again, and the depression that came with losing his sexuality has lifted.
“Fix the root issue, the depression lifts. The depression lifts, the sexuality comes back. The sexuality comes back, everything else starts to fall back into place.”
► Hear the whole story in this ED Client Success Story video.
Before and after: how it feels
Before
“Half the time I couldn't get hard, the rest of the time, I usually couldn't cum. I'd be in my head worrying, not present with my girlfriend at all.”
After
“Now it's 100% better. I'm present, I'm letting myself enjoy it. It feels like it did when I was in my 20s.”
Before
“It was a downward trajectory. The more I failed the more I feared failure. It got to the point where I didn't even want to try. It was burden. This one area of my life was having such an outsized impact.”
After
“I feel that animalistic drive again. I can do it so I feel more like myself again. It's freedom.”
Before
"PRESSURE. It was pure panic when I was with a girl who wanted to do it. My heart would race and I'd tense up. It was the same feeling as showing up to class as a kid and realizing you forgot there's a test."
After
"Confidence is back. I'm not rushing or checking. I'm relaxed - if it happens it happens, if doesn't it doesn't. Who cares? It's not outcome dependent anymore. I feel great."
Ready for your 'after?'
If you see yourself in these “before” descriptions and you’re ready for start work on your “after," the next step is simple.
Just book a call and we’ll see if this work is a good fit for you:
On that call, we’ll talk about what’s been going on, what you want instead, and whether this process is the right way to get you there.
Changes in your mind
Clients often tell me that, as we work, they notice things like:
- —Less catastrophic thinking before sex (“What if I fail again?” stops running on a loop).
- —Less replaying and analyzing after a less‑than‑perfect night.
- —A growing sense of “this is fixable, and I’m doing something about it.”
- —More room in their head for work, family, and things they actually enjoy.
“The biggest shift was in my head. My body followed, but my brain stopped treating sex like a life‑or‑death situation.”
Changes in your body
On the physical and practical side, the patterns often look like:
- —Easier to get and stay hard in real situations, not just alone.
- —Less tension before sex.
- —Fewer “shut‑down” episodes.
- —
“I’m no porn star, but I’m reliably hard most of the time, and when things aren’t perfect, it doesn’t wreck me. It feels…normal. That’s all I wanted.”
Changes in your sex life & relationship
- —Sex becoming more frequent, more relaxed and more enjoyable.
- —Easier, calmer conversations about sex.
- —Less avoiding touch or affection for fear of “where it might lead.”
- —More feeling like a team again instead of two people stuck in a problem.
“We stopped dancing around the issue. Once I wasn’t panicking about my performance all the time, we could just be close again.”
What this is not
It’s also important to be clear about what “results” aren’t:
- —Not perfection every time, with zero off nights.
- —Not a magic hypno-trick where I fix you while you sleep.
- —Not becoming unstoppably 100% confident 100% of the time.
- —The goal is a calm, solid, human sex life—where the occasional off night is just that: occasional, and not the center of your identity.
“Don’t start if you’re not ready to do the work. Brian will ask you to look at things in your life that are hard to face. That’s part of it. You’ve got to show up.”
Does this really work if you've already tried everything?
Nearly every guy I talk to has "tried everything" before they come to me. I'm almost never the first stop. This is what I see:
- —Almost every guy I've worked with who's tried and stuck with it has achieved the outcome they set at the beginning: a normal, reliable sex life that feels good to them.
- —Many start noticing meaningful shifts in how they feel about sex within weeks, even as we keep working on deeper patterns over a longer stretch of time.
- —The results "stick."
- —It doesn't matter if you've failed with talk therapy, EMDR, shockwave, pills, peptides, sex therapy, apps, etc. etc. It's a solvable problem.
“Before working with Brian, I tried sessions with two different sex therapists. It wasn't working and I figured there had to be a better, more efficient way. Now I have a beautiful sexual relationship!”
If you’re ready for these changes
Just book a private call and we’ll see if this work is a good fit for you.
On the call, we can talk about what’s been going on, what you want instead and whether this process is the right way to get you there. If it's not a fit, I'll do my best to help you with a referral.